A child’s IEP may describe accommodations, services, goals, and disability-related needs, but it cannot fully capture who that child is.
It does not show every interest that motivates them, every environment where they feel safe, or every creative way they may be able to demonstrate what they know. Supporting neurodivergent students effectively requires more than following a document. It requires curiosity, collaboration, flexibility, and a willingness to listen to the student.
In a conversation with educator Alexis Mays Fields, special education attorney Frances Shefter explored how schools and families can move beyond rigid expectations and create learning environments where students are seen as individuals.
The Goal Matters More Than One Required Method
Students are often given assignments with strict instructions about what materials to use and exactly what the finished product must look like.
That structure may help some children. For others, it can create frustration before meaningful learning even begins.
Frances offered a simple question educators and parents can use when evaluating an assignment:
What is the actual purpose of the task?
Is the goal for the student to demonstrate an understanding of a science concept? Practice writing? Learn how to work with clay? Identify the features of an animal?
Once the true objective is clear, there may be several appropriate ways for the student to reach it.
A student who struggles to write a traditional report might demonstrate the same knowledge through:
- A visual presentation
- A model or creative project
- Photography
- A storyboard
- A recorded explanation
- A combination of writing and art
This does not mean eliminating standards or expectations. It means separating the essential skill from unnecessary restrictions.
Alexis described this approach as providing creative freedom with the goal in mind. The destination remains the same, but students may have different ways of getting there.
When Inflexibility Looks Like a Behavior Problem
A child who is required to complete a task in a way that does not work for them may become anxious, shut down, refuse, or act out.
Adults may focus on the behavior without examining what happened immediately before it.
Was the student confused? Did the assignment require a skill unrelated to the learning objective? Was the child denied a familiar support? Did the student need an example, a movement break, or another way to respond?
Some students need open-ended creative freedom. Others need a clear model before they can begin. Effective differentiation can include both.
An educator might say:
“Here is one example you can follow. You may also create something different, as long as your project includes these key elements.”
That approach provides structure without unnecessarily limiting the student. It can reduce frustration while still holding the child accountable for demonstrating the required skill.
An Accommodation Must Be Used Before Test Day
An accommodation listed in an IEP should not appear for the first time during a major assessment.
A student who is supposed to receive extended time needs opportunities to learn how to use that time. A child with a read-aloud accommodation needs experience using it during regular instruction. A student who works with a scribe or assistive technology needs practice before the pressure of standardized testing.
As Frances explained, an accommodation should be used in the classroom if the student is expected to use it during testing.
Otherwise, the support itself may feel unfamiliar or uncomfortable. The student may decline it, rush through the assignment, or fail to understand how it is supposed to help.
Families can ask:
- Is my child receiving this accommodation consistently?
- In which classes is it being provided?
- Does my child understand when and how to use it?
- Is the school documenting whether it is effective?
- Has my child been taught how to advocate for the support?
Accommodations should not simply exist on paper. They should become practical tools the student understands and can use.
The IEP Team Must Actually Work as a Team
Special education services are often divided among teachers, psychologists, speech-language pathologists, behavior specialists, counselors, occupational therapists, and other professionals.
The danger is that each person may possess useful information without sharing it with everyone else.
Frances recalled an IEP meeting in which a speech-language pathologist described strategies that were working extremely well during therapy. The classroom teacher had never been told about them.
That communication gap matters.
A strategy that helps a child communicate, remain regulated, follow directions, or complete work in a therapy session may also help in the classroom. Similarly, information from home may explain why a child responds differently in one environment than another.
No single professional should become the sole decision-maker simply because that person conducted an evaluation or has a particular credential.
A psychologist can explain cognitive or behavioral findings. A classroom teacher can describe daily performance. A special educator can discuss specialized instruction. A related-service provider can explain therapeutic progress. Parents can share the child’s history, behavior, needs, and abilities outside school.
Each person contributes information from a different perspective. The team must then bring those perspectives together to determine what the individual child needs.
Parents Should Not Be the Last People to Know
IEP meetings can become overwhelming when parents hear unfamiliar concerns, recommendations, or terminology for the first time while sitting at the meeting table.
Whenever possible, families should receive information early enough to understand it and prepare meaningful questions.
Work samples, progress data, draft goals, evaluation reports, and clear explanations can make the conversation more productive. Translation and interpretation services should also be available when needed so language does not become a barrier to participation.
Parents should be able to walk into the meeting knowing what the team has observed, where their child is making progress, and where additional support may be needed.
The meeting should be a collaborative discussion—not a surprise announcement.
Help New Teachers See the Child, Not Just the File
A lengthy IEP can contain important legal and educational information, but it is not always the best introduction to a student.
Frances recommends that parents prepare a one-page profile at the beginning of the school year. Older students may be able to help create it themselves.
The page might include:
- The child’s interests and strengths
- What motivates them
- Early warning signs of frustration or overload
- Strategies that help them regulate
- Communication preferences
- Effective classroom supports
- What the child wants teachers to understand about them
For example, Frances shared that her daughter could regulate effectively when she knew there was a quiet, private place available in the classroom. Preparing that space in advance helped her remain in class, work through frustration, and return to learning.
A small amount of preparation can communicate something powerful to a child:
We knew you were coming, and we want you to succeed here.
Students Need a Voice in Their Own Support
Students often understand more about their learning needs than adults realize.
They may know that a service causes them to miss important instruction. They may recognize that a particular accommodation helps in one class but not another. They may be able to explain what causes anxiety, what makes them feel safe, and which teaching styles help them understand new material.
Frances described how her daughter began participating in portions of her IEP meetings when she was young. She did not attend every part. She joined long enough to talk about what was happening in class, what was working, and where she needed help.
Later, her daughter explained that being pulled from class for speech services increased her anxiety because she was missing instruction. That information changed how the adults viewed the service.
A service is not automatically beneficial simply because a student qualifies for it. The team must also consider whether the service is effective, appropriately delivered, and helping the student access education.
Student participation can take many forms. A child might:
- Attend part of the meeting
- Prepare a portfolio
- Record a short statement
- Complete a strengths-and-needs survey
- Share examples of helpful and unhelpful supports
- Identify personal goals
The purpose is not to make the child defend their needs. It is to teach self-awareness and gradually build self-advocacy.
A Child Is More Than Their Paperwork
Students with disabilities are sometimes judged before they enter the room.
A disability category, behavior report, disciplinary history, or previous teacher’s description can create expectations that shape how the next adult interprets everything the child does.
Alexis offered a message every student deserves to understand:
“I am not my paperwork.”
An IEP is one part of the student’s story. It should help adults understand and support the child, not limit what they believe the child can become.
Children need repeated opportunities to show up differently, build new relationships, discover their strengths, and experience success.
The strongest educational teams do more than manage deficits. They notice the student’s interests, build trust, share strategies, practice accommodations, and create multiple paths toward meaningful goals.
When families, educators, service providers, and students truly work together, the IEP becomes more than a document. It becomes a practical plan for helping a whole child participate, learn, and thrive.
If you’d like to talk to us, book a Free Case Analysis Here!
