In this episode of Stress-Free IEP® Frances looks back at the first year of the podcast, highlighting a few episodes that made an impression on her and her viewers. All of Frances’ guests are vetted and confirmed as subject matter experts who will be able to positively contribute to families going through an IEP process or the education law world.
Check out all of the episodes from the first year of Stress-Free IEP® here and see some highlights below:
Frances Shefter is an Education Attorney and Advocate who is committed to helping her clients have a Stress-Free IEP® experience. In each podcast, Frances interviews inspiring people to share information, educate you, empower you and help you get the knowledge you need.
VOICEOVER: (00:00:04): Welcome to Stress-Free IEP®. You do not need to do it all alone with your host, Frances Shefter, Principal of Shafter Law. You can get more details and catch prior episodes at www.shefterlaw.com. The Stress-Free IEP® video podcast is also posted on YouTube and LinkedIn and you can listen to episodes through Apple podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Stitcher and more. Now, here’s the host of Stress-Free IEP®. Frances Shefter.
Frances Shefter: (00:00:41): Hello, everyone and welcome to the show. So if you saw any of our advertising about the show, Sarah was supposed to be on the show today. Unfortunately, she had an emergency last minute. And as we all know, as parents, these things happen and definitely cannot be controlled. So I decided that I wanted to take some time and do a little bit of a solo and a history of stress-free IEP because this is the second year. We’re just about wrapping up our second year and today is the 42nd show and it just amazes me because when I started the show back in February of 2022 with Randy Brown, a neuropsychologist in New York, which is my first episode and she happens to be my cousin. I did not think it would grow to where we are today. But so thank you to my listeners for keeping us going. We have, I’m booked out into, I believe, March. So we have lots of guests coming up, but I wanted to look back at some of our guests. So Randy was our first episode and we learned about the numbers in a neuropsych report. And why using grades and using age don’t really work as well with comparing kids because of, you know, if yes, you’re first grade four months, but you could be a six year old in first grade, four months, you could be a seven year old in first grade, four months depending on where your birthday is or when you started school. So it doesn’t always work using that. So if you’re still confused by the numbers or you want an understanding of the bell curve to show things because that was the other thing we went into that the 25 to 75% is average being 27% does not mean your child is low. Go back and double check that that episode which we will have the link in the show notes. And so, you know, we’ve had so many great guests and I wanted to share a few particularly because of my personal experiences with them. So after I had Gabrielle S on the show and she was episode 20 she talked about on the show Alexander Technique and I’ve talked to so Czaja many people and shared so many people about it because it’s been amazing. My daughter and I go to, to learn technique and to, to do the tactile. And it’s been such an amazing difference in my daughter that I’ve seen in how she interacts with people and how she’s able to self regulate a little bit more. And so I wanted to share that, that if you don’t know about Alexander technique, which a lot of people don’t know about even other physical therapists because Gabrielle is a physical therapist, other physical therapists didn’t know about it. It’s out there and you can go back and, and watch episode 20 which again, we’ll have in the show notes below so that you can see what it is and how it works. But I just wanted to make sure I shared that personal experience because the guests I have on the show, a lot of them I’ve used or I recommend to other people and they’ve always come back as that they were excellent and they, uh they really helped the clients that in whatever area that may be. So I just wanted to make sure everybody knows like these guests are people, they’re not just anybody who wants to be on my show. I’ve kind of vetted most of them and met with most of them so that I can vouch for them that they are good at what they do. And so the other episode, which kind of triggered this idea of talking about some previous shows was Doctor Sticks Rood, which was episode 41 which lived air lat, uh, aired live last week. , but it, and should be posted to everything else. If you watch on something other than youtube or Facebook, it should be posted everywhere else in a couple of weeks. But Dr. Stixrud, was talking about giving our Children control. And if you watch that episode, you saw, you know, me giving up control is hard enough to begin with yet alone giving control to a nine and a six year old. But I took that step back and listened to what he said, you saw the show, I mentioned about how hard mornings were and how they were fighting and I was stressed and having anxiety and the kids were stressed. It was just not a great way to start our day. So I sat down after that show and had a conversation with my older daughter and said, hey, Chana, it’s really stressing me out in the mornings. I don’t like it. What do you think we can do to make it better? And she said, if I’m woken up by an alarm, ok, I could see that anything else I need to do. She’s like, well, the reminders still work. Like, ok, so the next morning I set an alarm on my phone and brought it in there and woke her up by the alarm. And for the first time in probably ever, we had a nice calm morning where she came downstairs, she was ready. She even had time for me to make breakfast instead of having a smoothie as she ran out the door and there was no stress and it was such an amazing experience that like the rest of my day felt better. So like, yes, giving our Children control, but it wasn’t giving her control of anything other than herself and how our mornings were gonna look like interacting and you know, there’s been some other things I’ve done with Chana and then my younger one, Esther in just giving them choices and it’s made such a difference. with Esther, you know, she has a little bit of anxiety, doesn’t like to leave the house. A lot of people know doesn’t want to and just taking when she gets deregulated and I’m forgetting which show it was. But about when a child gets deregulated, how if you get dysregulated and yelling and screaming and ordering and demanding, it’s not helping because she’s just going to get more dysregulated. Whereas when I take, took the step back and said, you know, I know Esther, I know it’s really hard and you don’t want to leave the house, but sometimes we need to do what we don’t want to do just because that’s what it is. And so can you do me a favor and can we just get dressed and go? It was going to Tae Kwon Do and go with daddy to go to Tae-kwon-do and then you’ll see me again when we get back because she’s also very attached to me. Well, she did, she calmed down, she got dressed, she then went to Tae-kwon-do. What happened at Tae-kwon-do might be a little bit different, but she at least got up and went and we didn’t have that screaming battle because as Dr. Stixrud knew and as it said, and as all of us parents know and guardians know we can’t force our child to do anything. Maybe under the three, we can pick them up and put them in the car, throw the clothes on them, things like that. But as they get older, we really can’t force them and getting into a battle with our Children that nobody’s gonna win. It’s not benefiting anybody is just a waste of time and stress for all of us. And as a parent and parent of neuro diverse Children, we’re stressed enough if we can reduce that stress. I know for me it’s helpful. So, uh I wanted to share those experiences with you as you all know, a mother of two nora diverse Children and how the show has helped me implement a lot of these things to move forward and to, to take the step back as a parent and look at how I can help and how I contribute to and look, we’re parents, it’s reality, we get this regulated as well. Our kids saying and doing certain things definitely trigger us. , and it’s, it’s hard, trust me. I have the hard time to, to not be triggered or to at least be aware of the trigger and step back and not let it get us fully just regulated as well. Because while it’s ok to show our Children that we’re just regulated when they’re just regulated, they really need us to be their calm and to help teach them how to regulate their emotions. So those are a couple of shows I wanted to highlight and I wanted to talk about, I am so excited for 2024 and some of the guests we have, , I’m really excited about it. I am gonna highlight one because I’m really excited about, uh Darnell Henderson is supposed to be on the show and he is the attorney for PG County public Schools and I’m so excited about this because everybody’s going wait, don’t you sue the school systems? Why would you have an attorney from the school system on the show? And when Mr Darnell and I talked and talked about it, it was, you know what it is good because he and I have a decent relationship, we might disagree and that’s ok, but it doesn’t have to be adversarial in the sense of we can still be respectful, respectful of each other and get to our, our goals or agree to disagree. And if we have to go to court, we go to court. But it’s just the fact that having somebody from a school system, I think it’s just gonna be a new look onto how different things are. And so as I said, I’m booked out into March, so I’m excited. So if you’re watching the show or listening to the show, please, on whatever platform you’re doing, subscribe, like share the show, let’s get it out there. I really like helping families and that’s where this show came from. Know what’s out there because when, when we get a new diagnosis as a parent for our Children, I know for me like, where do we turn? Who do we talk to, who can be in our community? Who’s our community? Because as everybody says, it takes a village to raise a child. So we as parents need to develop our community. And that’s my show is about, is to help show people who’s out there in the community and who can be part of your community to help raise your child. Please share the show, like, subscribe and I keep saying this and I truly believe it. If you have somebody that you think would be great on the show or a topic, if you watch my uh my little short videos or a topic you think I want you want me to talk about? Please feel free comment below. Send me an email at info@Shefterlaw.com and we will take those into consideration when I have guests and when I have topics. So here we are. Thank you all so much for listening. I couldn’t do this all without you. And thank you for my fabulous team that helped me get off, , get off the ground running, uh which is video socials, give a shout out to them and their VIP services. Thank you so much and Happy New Year and Happy holidays for those that are watching live. And if you’re not have a great New Year because you’re still listening and it’s the beginning of the New Year. Hopefully, see you all soon.
VOICEOVER: (00:12:42): You’ve been listening to stress free IEP with your host, Frances Shefter. Remember you do not need to do it all alone. You can reach Frances through Shefter law.com where prior episodes are also posted. Thank you for your positive reviews, comments and sharing the show with others through youtube, linkedin Apple podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Stitcher and more.
A Look Back at a Year of Stress-Free IEP®
Stress-Free IEP® with Frances Shefter, Episode 42
In this episode of Stress-Free IEP® Frances looks back at the first year of the podcast, highlighting a few episodes that made an impression on her and her viewers. All of Frances’ guests are vetted and confirmed as subject matter experts who will be able to positively contribute to families going through an IEP process or the education law world.
Check out all of the episodes from the first year of Stress-Free IEP® here and see some highlights below:
***********************************
Stress-Free IEP®:
Frances Shefter is an Education Attorney and Advocate who is committed to helping her clients have a Stress-Free IEP® experience. In each podcast, Frances interviews inspiring people to share information, educate you, empower you and help you get the knowledge you need.
Watch more episodes of Stress-Free IEP®:
Connect and learn more from your host, Frances Shefter:
FULL TRANSCRIPT:
VOICEOVER: (00:00:04): Welcome to Stress-Free IEP®. You do not need to do it all alone with your host, Frances Shefter, Principal of Shafter Law. You can get more details and catch prior episodes at www.shefterlaw.com. The Stress-Free IEP® video podcast is also posted on YouTube and LinkedIn and you can listen to episodes through Apple podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Stitcher and more. Now, here’s the host of Stress-Free IEP®. Frances Shefter.
Frances Shefter: (00:00:41): Hello, everyone and welcome to the show. So if you saw any of our advertising about the show, Sarah was supposed to be on the show today. Unfortunately, she had an emergency last minute. And as we all know, as parents, these things happen and definitely cannot be controlled. So I decided that I wanted to take some time and do a little bit of a solo and a history of stress-free IEP because this is the second year. We’re just about wrapping up our second year and today is the 42nd show and it just amazes me because when I started the show back in February of 2022 with Randy Brown, a neuropsychologist in New York, which is my first episode and she happens to be my cousin. I did not think it would grow to where we are today. But so thank you to my listeners for keeping us going. We have, I’m booked out into, I believe, March. So we have lots of guests coming up, but I wanted to look back at some of our guests. So Randy was our first episode and we learned about the numbers in a neuropsych report. And why using grades and using age don’t really work as well with comparing kids because of, you know, if yes, you’re first grade four months, but you could be a six year old in first grade, four months, you could be a seven year old in first grade, four months depending on where your birthday is or when you started school. So it doesn’t always work using that. So if you’re still confused by the numbers or you want an understanding of the bell curve to show things because that was the other thing we went into that the 25 to 75% is average being 27% does not mean your child is low. Go back and double check that that episode which we will have the link in the show notes. And so, you know, we’ve had so many great guests and I wanted to share a few particularly because of my personal experiences with them. So after I had Gabrielle S on the show and she was episode 20 she talked about on the show Alexander Technique and I’ve talked to so Czaja many people and shared so many people about it because it’s been amazing. My daughter and I go to, to learn technique and to, to do the tactile. And it’s been such an amazing difference in my daughter that I’ve seen in how she interacts with people and how she’s able to self regulate a little bit more. And so I wanted to share that, that if you don’t know about Alexander technique, which a lot of people don’t know about even other physical therapists because Gabrielle is a physical therapist, other physical therapists didn’t know about it. It’s out there and you can go back and, and watch episode 20 which again, we’ll have in the show notes below so that you can see what it is and how it works. But I just wanted to make sure I shared that personal experience because the guests I have on the show, a lot of them I’ve used or I recommend to other people and they’ve always come back as that they were excellent and they, uh they really helped the clients that in whatever area that may be. So I just wanted to make sure everybody knows like these guests are people, they’re not just anybody who wants to be on my show. I’ve kind of vetted most of them and met with most of them so that I can vouch for them that they are good at what they do. And so the other episode, which kind of triggered this idea of talking about some previous shows was Doctor Sticks Rood, which was episode 41 which lived air lat, uh, aired live last week. , but it, and should be posted to everything else. If you watch on something other than youtube or Facebook, it should be posted everywhere else in a couple of weeks. But Dr. Stixrud, was talking about giving our Children control. And if you watch that episode, you saw, you know, me giving up control is hard enough to begin with yet alone giving control to a nine and a six year old. But I took that step back and listened to what he said, you saw the show, I mentioned about how hard mornings were and how they were fighting and I was stressed and having anxiety and the kids were stressed. It was just not a great way to start our day. So I sat down after that show and had a conversation with my older daughter and said, hey, Chana, it’s really stressing me out in the mornings. I don’t like it. What do you think we can do to make it better? And she said, if I’m woken up by an alarm, ok, I could see that anything else I need to do. She’s like, well, the reminders still work. Like, ok, so the next morning I set an alarm on my phone and brought it in there and woke her up by the alarm. And for the first time in probably ever, we had a nice calm morning where she came downstairs, she was ready. She even had time for me to make breakfast instead of having a smoothie as she ran out the door and there was no stress and it was such an amazing experience that like the rest of my day felt better. So like, yes, giving our Children control, but it wasn’t giving her control of anything other than herself and how our mornings were gonna look like interacting and you know, there’s been some other things I’ve done with Chana and then my younger one, Esther in just giving them choices and it’s made such a difference. with Esther, you know, she has a little bit of anxiety, doesn’t like to leave the house. A lot of people know doesn’t want to and just taking when she gets deregulated and I’m forgetting which show it was. But about when a child gets deregulated, how if you get dysregulated and yelling and screaming and ordering and demanding, it’s not helping because she’s just going to get more dysregulated. Whereas when I take, took the step back and said, you know, I know Esther, I know it’s really hard and you don’t want to leave the house, but sometimes we need to do what we don’t want to do just because that’s what it is. And so can you do me a favor and can we just get dressed and go? It was going to Tae Kwon Do and go with daddy to go to Tae-kwon-do and then you’ll see me again when we get back because she’s also very attached to me. Well, she did, she calmed down, she got dressed, she then went to Tae-kwon-do. What happened at Tae-kwon-do might be a little bit different, but she at least got up and went and we didn’t have that screaming battle because as Dr. Stixrud knew and as it said, and as all of us parents know and guardians know we can’t force our child to do anything. Maybe under the three, we can pick them up and put them in the car, throw the clothes on them, things like that. But as they get older, we really can’t force them and getting into a battle with our Children that nobody’s gonna win. It’s not benefiting anybody is just a waste of time and stress for all of us. And as a parent and parent of neuro diverse Children, we’re stressed enough if we can reduce that stress. I know for me it’s helpful. So, uh I wanted to share those experiences with you as you all know, a mother of two nora diverse Children and how the show has helped me implement a lot of these things to move forward and to, to take the step back as a parent and look at how I can help and how I contribute to and look, we’re parents, it’s reality, we get this regulated as well. Our kids saying and doing certain things definitely trigger us. , and it’s, it’s hard, trust me. I have the hard time to, to not be triggered or to at least be aware of the trigger and step back and not let it get us fully just regulated as well. Because while it’s ok to show our Children that we’re just regulated when they’re just regulated, they really need us to be their calm and to help teach them how to regulate their emotions. So those are a couple of shows I wanted to highlight and I wanted to talk about, I am so excited for 2024 and some of the guests we have, , I’m really excited about it. I am gonna highlight one because I’m really excited about, uh Darnell Henderson is supposed to be on the show and he is the attorney for PG County public Schools and I’m so excited about this because everybody’s going wait, don’t you sue the school systems? Why would you have an attorney from the school system on the show? And when Mr Darnell and I talked and talked about it, it was, you know what it is good because he and I have a decent relationship, we might disagree and that’s ok, but it doesn’t have to be adversarial in the sense of we can still be respectful, respectful of each other and get to our, our goals or agree to disagree. And if we have to go to court, we go to court. But it’s just the fact that having somebody from a school system, I think it’s just gonna be a new look onto how different things are. And so as I said, I’m booked out into March, so I’m excited. So if you’re watching the show or listening to the show, please, on whatever platform you’re doing, subscribe, like share the show, let’s get it out there. I really like helping families and that’s where this show came from. Know what’s out there because when, when we get a new diagnosis as a parent for our Children, I know for me like, where do we turn? Who do we talk to, who can be in our community? Who’s our community? Because as everybody says, it takes a village to raise a child. So we as parents need to develop our community. And that’s my show is about, is to help show people who’s out there in the community and who can be part of your community to help raise your child. Please share the show, like, subscribe and I keep saying this and I truly believe it. If you have somebody that you think would be great on the show or a topic, if you watch my uh my little short videos or a topic you think I want you want me to talk about? Please feel free comment below. Send me an email at info@Shefterlaw.com and we will take those into consideration when I have guests and when I have topics. So here we are. Thank you all so much for listening. I couldn’t do this all without you. And thank you for my fabulous team that helped me get off, , get off the ground running, uh which is video socials, give a shout out to them and their VIP services. Thank you so much and Happy New Year and Happy holidays for those that are watching live. And if you’re not have a great New Year because you’re still listening and it’s the beginning of the New Year. Hopefully, see you all soon.
VOICEOVER: (00:12:42): You’ve been listening to stress free IEP with your host, Frances Shefter. Remember you do not need to do it all alone. You can reach Frances through Shefter law.com where prior episodes are also posted. Thank you for your positive reviews, comments and sharing the show with others through youtube, linkedin Apple podcasts, Spotify, Google Podcasts, Stitcher and more.
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