In this episode of Stress-Free IEP®, Frances Shefter speaks with Crista Hopp, owner of and Executive Function Coach at Connected Pathways Coaching.
Crista is an accomplished professional with a Bachelor’s degree from Rowan University and a Master’s Degree in Counseling Psychology from Bowie University. Her career journey began at the ARC of Cape May County, New Jersey, managing residential homes for teens and adults. Crista later served as the Research Coordinator for the PETIT Study in Northern Virginia, where she conducted neuropsychological assessments and supervised students from local universities.
In 2014, Crista founded Connected Pathways Coaching, LLC, specializing in coaching children with ADHD and teens and college students with ADHD. With a diverse background in counseling, research, and coaching, she brings a unique skill set to help families, especially younger children, unlock their potential.
Tune in to the episode to hear about:
What an executive function coach is
What ages can benefit from executive function coaching
The power of free play
Blending home and school habits and functioning skills
Frances Shefter is an Education Attorney and Advocate who is committed to helping her clients have a Stress-Free IEP® experience. In each podcast, Frances interviews inspiring people to share information, educate you, empower you and help you get the knowledge you need.
VOICEOVER: (00:00:01): Welcome to Stress-Free IEP®. You do not need to do it all alone with your host, Frances Shefter, Principal of Shefter Law. You can get more details and catch prior episodes at www.Shefterlaw.com. The Stress-Free IEP® video podcast is also posted on YouTube and LinkedIn and you can listen to episodes through Apple podcasts, Spotify, Google podcast, Stitcher and more. Now, here’s the host of Stress-Free IEP®. Frances Shefter.
Frances Shefter: (00:00:37): Hello everyone and welcome to the show and for those of you watching it live, it’s the end of September already. I cannot believe we’re already a month into school and it’s been crazy. And if you’ve been watching a lot of my videos, you know that we’ve kind of been having a theme going on about taking care of you as the parent because it’s very important that we take care of ourselves so that we can be there for our little ones. And so today’s special guest is Crista Hopp with Connected Pathways Coaching and she has a little bit of a different approach. So Crista, please introduce yourself. Tell us a little bit about yourself.
Crista Hopp: (00:01:13): So I’m Crista Hopp, I’m an Executive Function ADHD and Academic coach. I have a coaching practice that I’ve had for almost 10 years now. And I’ve been working with kids with disabilities and without, for probably close to 30 years now. For me it’s really been about how can we help the kids who often are kind of slipping through the school system? Very bright kids often but need a lot of support around them.
Frances Shefter: (00:01:45): Yeah. That’s so true because I know there’s been a lot of times for me that I’ve talked to potential clients or even clients and said, you know, the schools can do a lot with executive functioning, but is it transferring back to the home and the schools can’t necessarily do that? I guess that’s where you come in, right? You can help in the home.
Crista Hopp: (00:02:03): Absolutely. As executive function coaches, we help at the home, but we also help with school support. So it’s kind of a combination of both. I feel like we’re a group of people that has a foot in each door. So when we work with students more often than not, I would say 90% of our referrals are coming to us because their students are struggling in school in some way and so often what we’re doing is going in helping kids come up with different organization methods or planning. It could also be self-regulation. just a whole variety of different things. And so we help support them, whether it is a homework routine or perhaps it’s a routine to get out the door in the morning. So it really does vary. But we help with both school items as well as items at home.
Frances Shefter: (00:02:52): And so it’s continued. So, because that’s one of the things, if they’re doing this in school and they’re doing this in therapy and they’re doing this home the kids can’t wait but that’s school stuff. I don’t have to do that here, you know?
Crista Hopp: (00:03:05): Right. Exactly. Yeah. So it’s nice to have that person who can kind of put the whole picture together and make sure that the kids are getting the support in whichever environment they are in that moment that they need to help in.
Frances Shefter: (00:03:19): That’s awesome. And so do you, I know there’s been a lot of talk that executive functioning has been like a lot of people now, it’s almost everybody coming through our doors. It’s something in executive functioning or just executive functioning. Why is that? Why do you think we’re seeing more of that?
Crista Hopp: (00:03:38): I personally think it gets back to the way our society is structured. We’re a super structured society and I really think it gets back to free play if we look at it. You know, unlike when some of us were little and you would come home from school and you would go out and play and you would get together there with a group of kids and, you know, you guys would decide as a group, what you were gonna do and who was gonna be the leader and what were the rules gonna be? Kids don’t really have, have that as often. We see preschool programs that are extremely structured. We even see kids that are, you know, getting together with other kids, they’re structured play dates, parents are often kind of deciding what is gonna be done during those activities. And so kids are not really being taught some of these crucial problem solving skills at a younger age. And so I see what’s happening is by the time they get to the age where some of these things should become more independent, they just don’t have those skills.
Frances Shefter: (00:04:39): Of course you went somewhere totally different because everybody’s like, oh, it’s because of COVID because they’re home and they didn’t have to do it. Their parents were doing it for them. Well, that, I mean, that’s what everybody’s saying and it’s true to an extent. But I love that you say that, you know, we’re not, you know, it, my husband and I talk about it all the time. We grow up in the era of like you go out and when the street lights came on, you come home. And, and I, when I moved into my neighborhood now I’m in a cul de sac and there were no kids and I’m so excited because we now have a couple of families with kids and they’re, like, constantly out in the cul-de-sac playing or going to each other’s houses and coming up with games, and thinking, having the problem solving. But I know a lot of people don’t have that because, I mean, I feel very lucky with the cul de sac because I feel safe in our neighborhood.
Crista Hopp: (00:05:29): Right. Yeah. So I really think it gets back to that, that free play now. Has it definitely been impacted by some of these things like COVID? Absolutely. There’s no doubt about it. I think kids are probably struggling more now than they definitely did five years ago. We’re definitely seeing it, and ironically, I actually think the group that we’re seeing it with the most, it’s not talked about enough is actually college kids. We’re seeing it a lot more in college than we are necessarily in middle school and high schoolers.
Frances Shefter: (00:06:00): Interesting. Ok. Yeah. I mean, I can see that because I know for me at least also going to college, like, all of a sudden you need to do it all by yourself. And I did have an IEP growing up and I can, I know that something we talk about a lot in IEP meetings and with my family is, is about the transition stuff. Exactly. That’s where the executive functioning comes in and the transition planning because you don’t get to take your IEP to college with you. You know, and you’re not gonna have that.
Crista Hopp: (00:06:32): Right. And it’s not even just that. Right. Like, I’ve had parents the last couple of years that have called me and I said, Crista, I’m worried they’re not gonna remember to eat. I’m worried that, you know, they’re gonna forget to take their medicine or I had one person who knows that I’ve been kind of trying to develop this transitional program where we’ll start with high schoolers and kind of really focus on these life skills and she’s like, you need to add to your list. Crista how to address an envelope. Like, I mean, so it’s really crazy but all of these different things they’re now gonna be responsible for that they have to do.
Frances Shefter: (00:07:06): Yeah. You know, I mean, you don’t think about that, like, it’s just, you know, the kids hit 18 and go out to college and like, boom, they’re expected to do all this stuff and if you’re not taught how to do it, like, how do you do it? You know, some of us are lucky enough that we have parents that have taught us but other kids might not or their parents themselves have executive functioning issues. So if they don’t have the skills, how are they going to teach it to their children?
Crista Hopp: (00:07:29): Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.
Frances Shefter: (00:07:32): I mean, that’s still on the college level. But what age do you think kids should start with executive functioning coaches? The earlier, the better?
Crista Hopp: (00:07:40): I think that ideally when we can get students that are in third or fourth grade, usually what we like to do is start with a little bit of parent coaching, do a couple of months of parent coaching just to get that foundation in. And when I talk about the foundation, what I’m talking about is raising a child who’s neurodivergent is different than raising a neurotypical child. And to be honest with you, I don’t even really necessarily agree. There is a neurotypical person, but that’s a whole nother story, right? But understanding the brain, you know, helping families realize that how the brain is actually structurally different. And so why is it harder to parent a child who might have ADHD or might have just grasp something like this? And what can we put in at home to kind of help support that environment? So, working with the parents for a few months and then when we start to work with the the kids, it it’s fabulous. So the younger we get them and I’ve actually been told by psychologists, they can actually see it. So when they go back to have these reevaluations, they are actually seeing improvements in areas of executive functioning. So they can see that a student has been working with an executive function coach.
Frances Shefter: (00:08:56): Wow. And it’s great working with the parents. You know, and you don’t, you say about raising a neurotypical versus raising neurodiverse, but, like raising any child, every single one is different. You know, my girls are three years apart and, yeah, what works for one does not work for the other. You know, we joke around all the time like that. You know, kids don’t come with handbooks and even if they did the next kid’s gonna come along and it’s gonna be a totally different handbook. So we just throw it out the window.
Crista Hopp: (00:9:24): And I think that’s why kind of being an executive function coach is one of the reasons I love it so much is I often tell the kids like all of our brains are unique and if we can figure out what our brain needs in order to be successful, that’s our goal. I don’t want to be just another adult that’s telling a kid what to do. I want them to understand. Well, this is happening in my brain. So if I practice something everyday, I’m actually building a neuropath way which means that it becomes easier for me to do it. So I think kind of having that understanding that we’re all unique is, is important too.
Frances Shefter: (00:9:59): I love that. It’s my, I’m getting my kids evaluated and that’s one of the things they’re like, well, what are we, why, are we going? And I said, because your brain works differently and we want to figure out how your brain is working so how we can learn the best. And so both of them were like, ok, yay. You know, they’re so excited about going because, you know, it’s true. I remember as a teenager I used to say, you know, people would say I was weird. I’m like, no, I’m unique, you know, and why be normal, you know, what is normal?
Crista Hopp: (00:10:27):. Right. Exactly.
Frances Shefter: (00:10:31): You know, what is normal? So the earlier, the better, you said third or fourth grade was probably best.
Crista Hopp: (00:10:40): I like that age, third or fourth. I think that they’re starting to kind of put some foundational skills into place. And one of the things that we notice as coaches is that, you know, elementary school teachers are really good about having these organizational systems in place. But one of the things that we’re not seeing is that they’re often not explained to kids, they’re just put into place. And so when they’re making that transition from elementary to middle, all of a sudden, they’re expected to be organized, they’re expected to be able to kind of keep everything in place and to manage everything and to write everything down. And the reality is they’ve never been taught these systems. And so kind of, if we have them at that younger age, we can start explaining the why and explaining how and figuring out what’s gonna work for them. And then by the time they get to middle school, we’re just refining those systems and, and making sure that they’re in place.
Frances Shefter: (00:11:32): And that makes sense also because it’s third grade is where the curriculum starts getting harder. I remember an article like way back when, when I was in my teaching days that talked about how if you don’t catch a child by third grade, that the dropout rate is so much higher that it’s, you know, third grade is when it’s the, that’s when things change and things start getting harder. And so teaching them not saying the kids will drop out if you don’t hire an executive coach. But it’s just, it gets harder and the kids are just, you know, and that’s when they’re expected to be more responsible. I mean, my daughter’s in fourth grade and we talk about it all the time, like, you know, the kindergarten holding hands first grade, second grade and even third grade. And now all of a sudden in fourth grade they have all these homework assignments that they’re given assignment on Monday that’s supposed to do every night during the week, due on Friday doing it Thursday night doesn’t always work. But if you’re not taught that and then now all of a sudden homework matters, it’s part of your routine.
Crista Hopp: (00:12:34): Exactly. Yeah, it makes a difference. Yeah. So definitely the younger we can get and then what happens a lot of times I, I think there’s, there’s a couple of different cases. I always say to the parents that coaching is a journey. So it’s not something where with all kids, I see them for a semester and everything clicks and everything is great for some kids. It’s a journey and so coaching might take a longer time, especially if we’re looking at someone who might have more than one area of difficulties, especially when we have things like autism or if we have anxiety or depression, in those cases, we definitely tend to be with our students a little bit longer. And then what happens is for some times we’ll see a student for a period of time, then they’ll take a break and then they might return for transitional period. So for example, I have a student right now who’s in college. I literally see him 15 minutes a week. But when he was in eighth grade or ninth grade, I saw him all the time. He took a break for his last two years of high school and then he came back as a college student. And now we’ve weaned it down to like 15 minutes and I think for him, it’s more just having that second set of eyes so that he can make sure that he is where he needs to be. So that happens with some kids where we’re kind of just being there for those transitional periods and then for other families, especially like you mentioned how some families where the parents do have their own executive function challenges, it’s easier to have that other person that is playing that role of kind of navigating everything. And so for some parents, they hire us with the kids at a younger age and we follow them to college. So we have them for a longer period of time and lots of times that’s just because it’s easier to have someone who’s not the parent being able to navigate some of these things.
Frances Shefter: (00:14:19): Yeah. I wanna make sure we’re clear on this. It’s not only parents that have executive functioning, that need to hire executive functioning coaches for the kids, you know, it’s my, you know, my tagline, you do not need to do it all alone. And that’s kind of been my theme of like, hey, it’s ok to ask for help. I mean, these days parents are expected to do everything. You know, we’re, we’re working full time, we’re cooking dinner, we’re shopping, we’re doing everything and it’s not only the moms, dads are doing it all too. I don’t know about everybody else but I’m tired when I get home from work, I don’t want to have the fight with my kid for homework and making sure it’s organized. And so having somebody like you come in makes life easier for all of us. Right.
Crista Hopp: (00:15:01): Exactly. And I find that sometimes we kind of play this role where we’re kind of wearing this hat as kind of being the organizer. So it’s very common to get a family who’s kind of been given that, that 30 page report from a psychologist, they’re trying to navigate it, you know, they’re, it’s so overwhelming and then they’re recommended to an executive function coach, come to see us and we’re kind of helping them kind of navigate the scene. And so it’s very common for me to be working really closely with advocates, educational lawyers, psychologists, therapists, you know, even doctors because we kind of work together as a team. And, you know, I can tell, you know, if I have a student who’s really struggling in school and the family is really struggling during that IEP process or the 504 process, then I can go ahead and refer them to either an advocate or educational lawyer depending on their needs. But then sometimes it can be, you know, I think maybe a little therapy might help your child. So maybe we should try to find a therapist that can help or it could be a reading tutor. I think that’s another big misunderstanding. Executive function coaches are not content tutors. And so often people will be like, well, I need you to kind of tutor my child and no, we’re not tutors. We’re coaches. Many people don’t realize that the number one predictor of both academic and life success is actually executive functions. And so when we think about that, how imperative these life skills are, that role is really important.
Frances Shefter: (00:16:40): That makes sense. That makes sense. Like I just think of, you know, we used to call them scatter brains right when we were younger and most likely they had executive functioning issues. ADHD or other stuff. But I don’t know, I think we’re around the same age that when we went to school it was like specialized, you know?
Crista Hopp: (00:16:58): Exactly. And that was another, that’s kind of a reason how I got here as a coach was, I was working for a research study out of a big hospital system in the area. And I was working under a neuropsychologist and we were doing testing, neuro psych testing to see the development of kids that were born preterm versus full term. And we were testing the kids at ages 3-6 and nine and we had so many of our controls, meaning our kids that were not born premature, that were coming through and testing really well when it came to, you know, their different academic skills and their IQ. But then families were so concerned because my kid does their homework but then they lose it or they forget to, you know, submit it or, you know, they can’t find, you know, their books to save their lives. You know. And so there was this group of kids that were out there that were not getting a diagnosis of ADHD or autism or learning disabilities, but, had executive function challenges. And I think that’s another unknown is that you do not need to have any diagnosable disability in order to have executive function deficits. Because the reality is, we all have them no matter who we have executive function, strengths and weaknesses.
Frances Shefter: (00:18:19): That makes so much sense that you don’t. And I’m thinking back to cases that I’ve had in families that, you know, we knew something was going on and needed IEP support, but it didn’t fit in one of the little holes. That’s a whole another topic that gets me frustrated of like you have to fit in this mold. I mean, it’s better than what we had before but for our kids with executive functioning and I talk about it all the time that the schools don’t teach regular life skills anymore. You know, I don’t think they have home ec anymore where you learn how to plan a meal and budget and shop and then cook it. You know, that doesn’t come naturally.
Crista Hopp: (00:19:02): Exactly. And it’s funny, I had a team meeting earlier and we were talking about, I have quite a few of our coaches who are in graduate school and we were talking about how, you know, teachers are. Most teachers are not even taught about executive functions in their teaching programs. And so they might have a webinar here or there or workshop, but they’re not being taught how to teach these crucial life skills. But it’s not just about the life skill part about it. All of these executive functions actually trickle down into the academics too. So if we have a student who might be struggling with flexibility, we might see this actually in their reading comprehension, we might see it in their ability to do math. And so by having this group of educators that have not been educated in this area, it’s really impacting our students in the long run.
Frances Shefter: (00:20:00): I love our teachers. I used to be a teacher, I’d never knocked teachers but they’re not trained. And I feel, you know, I don’t want to say I feel sorry for them, but it’s hard, you know, because, I have teachers that have said to me all the time, like, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to, you know, I don’t know how to do that. Like, what, what am I supposed to do? And I remember when I went to my master’s program and I was learning special education because undergrad was early childhood. And I’m learning all these techniques in special ed. And I had been already been teaching for, like, four years and I’m like, oh, my God, if I had known this then
Crista Hopp: (00:20:38): Right?
Frances Shefter: (00:20:39): Why don’t they teach this to teachers?
Crista Hopp: (00:20:41): Exactly. Basic classroom stuff. Yeah. My mom’s a retired school teacher and, you know, she says to me all the time, she’s like Crista, I never even learned this in my special ed program. She’s like, I’ve learned it from you. She’s like, we were never taught these things, you know, and so that’s been another goal of mine and in the last several years is I want to have these things accessible for both teachers and tutors and coaches. I want them to have that ability to actually understand executive function, understand the different strategies and techniques that they can be incorporating even into the curriculums that they’re utilizing just so they can, you know, help the students that are working, you know, that they’re working with. And so I’ve been, you know, created this executive function course and I’ve been really fortunate to have many teachers that are taking it and their school systems are paying for it, which is and nicer. So they’re able to get that support, but so many of them are kind of giving me feedback and they’re going, I can’t believe I taught for 30 years and I never knew this. Like, you know, it’s, it’s kind of crazy, you know. So, yeah, so it’s been a passion of mine to just really make sure that, you know, as educators, anybody who is working in education, whether you’re a coach, a tutor or a teacher, that we are able to kind of really support all students, not just a group of students.
Frances Shefter: (00:22:02): That’s so great. So your course, I know I wanted to talk about that. So you have an executive functioning course but, but it’s geared towards for teachers or is there a different one for parents or is it the same? What does that look like?
Crista Hopp: (00:22:13): So it’s actually been created for teachers, tutors and coaches. It’s this course that is, you know, the goal is for you to become an executive function specialist. There’s modules that kind of hit on some of the main executive functions. I do a lot of brain science, talk about research and then different strategies and techniques are utilized. And I I use a great video program so that you’re not actually just kind of listening to kind of a power point, you actually can see some of these strategies and techniques actually being acted out with characters because I thought it was really important for people to see it. But I’ve had quite a few parents that have actually taken it too because they said, you know what, I’m not a teacher, a tutor but, uh, you know, I’m a, I’m a parent and I need this. So, so a lot of parents have taken it as well and find it extremely helpful.
Frances Shefter: (00:23:02): That is so great. And it’s, I’m assuming it’s on your website.
Crista Hopp: (00:23:06): It is on the website. Yep, it’s, executive function specialist course. And, , right now it’s about 20 hours. And you literally walk out of it, , with different strategies, techniques, activities. I have everybody actually do some of the activities themselves to experience the executive function. So I’m not just giving you activities to do with your students or your children. You are actually going to experience some of those executive functions. So you really walk away with understanding what it is and then what you can do to help whether it’s in a classroom or at home.
Frances Shefter: (00:23:40): That makes so much sense. It I’m reminded of a class that I took that the teacher made us all crawl under the desks and look up at the teacher. What do you see? And you saw legs and a head and arms, right? What do you think kids draw when they’re preschool? Right. There’s a body, you don’t see a body at that angle and it was just, it was an eye opening for us of like, oh, because you don’t think about that because it’s been so long since we’ve been that young. , they love that so that you make them experience it because if you don’t know, like, it’s hard, like, if you don’t know, you don’t know. You know, but to experience it is how you really learn of what’s happening in the child’s brain to help you.
Crista Hopp: (00:24:28): Exactly. Yeah. So, I tried to make it as comprehensive as possible and the brain science. I’m a really big believer in understanding the brain because if we under like, like my fourth graders know what a narrow pathway is because I just think it’s so important again, I think part of it is just, I don’t want to be that adult who’s telling a kid what to do. I want them to explain. Like, why am I suggesting this, why might this be a good idea? Kids are more likely to be open to suggestions if they understand the why?
Frances Shefter: (00:25:02): That makes sense. You know, I’ve heard so many times I’ve heard kids or parents and it breaks, I mean, I know it breaks my heart as well as clients when the kids. Like, why am I so different? Why can’t I just be normal? , and that’s like the whole other thing of special education. I don’t even like, you know, we all learn differently, you know, we need to have something but it’s, it’s different education. It’s not, you know, it’s special education. And somebody said, , it’s because your kids special but all of our kids are special and so it’s, I love that you teach the kids how to understand their brain. ecause that’s, if you don’t understand the, why, you know, why are you gonna do it?
Crista Hopp: (00:25:41): Right. Right. Why am I gonna do something if I don’t know why I’m doing it? Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. , by the end of the week I’m gonna have a great activity on my website and it’s one of the ones that I do a lot. I do it with all the kids and when I used to do them in person, I used to do it in person and it’s organizing candy, but I always like to start my parent coaching that way too, especially if I have both parents present because the idea behind it is to see, you know, how do you naturally organize and you’re kind of given a pile of candy and you have to organize it. But I love doing the activity because every person tends to kind of slightly do it different. And it’s always nice when parents are like, oh, you, you did it that way, like I did it this way. So to help them realize that just because they might, you know, have organized their notebook in a certain way or they keep track of things in a certain way. That doesn’t mean that’s gonna work for their kids. Their kid actually might need a different system. That’s going to work for their brain.
Frances Shefter: (00:26:41): Which may, I mean, it makes so much sense. It’s just like, and I’m even thinking on the business side of the coaching, you know, my business coach saying like that we hire people and I’m trying to micromanage, I’m like, wait, stop, like I know my brain is great for this stuff. Right. That, for that stuff. And I hired my assistant to do that stuff. Step out. Let’s see how he figures it out. And you know what he did better than I would have done. So that makes sense for parents to because we think, you know, yeah, there are kids. So they’re gonna think the same way as us and their brain is gonna work the same way. But no, they’re half us and half the other parent.
Crista Hopp: (00:27:18): Exactly. What parts. How does it work? And I think that’s another nice thing that I sometimes do with parent coaching is I have both parents do an executive function assessment on themselves. And one of the reasons I do that too is because often what I find is that lots of parents are opposites. Right? Because opposites attract usually. And so kind of even helping families kind of use that information so that if they have a choice, like, say mom is a better organizer than dad. Well, if mom is able to, maybe she is that person who’s gonna help child set up a notebook and kind of understand that. Ok, let’s try to set this up, but let’s work a way that works for you and let’s kind of understand this and maybe if dad is better at regulation, maybe he’s the one that if he’s around in those moments where a child’s really having difficulties regulating themselves, he can be the one that can step in. So even just parents understanding their own executive functions can actually be a great tool for them to utilize as a family when possible.
Frances Shefter: (00:28:22): Yeah. I’m like thinking I need to do that because I know, you know, I’ve said it to my husband before, when we fight and stuff, it’s like we both have to remind ourselves that our brains work differently to begin with. We were also brought up differently. Our life experiences are different and so how we handle something is gonna be different and it’s ok.
Crista Hopp: (00:28:41): Exactly.
Frances Shefter: (00:28:42): Exactly. And that, and it’s important to teach our kids that like, it’s ok, everybody’s brain works different. You’re ok. You’re not strange, you’re not abnormal, you’re not, you know, it’s ok. That activity wasn’t for you. You know, there’s nothing wrong with you. So somebody taught me like years ago about and I love this analogy of when you go shopping for a shirt and you walk into a store and you see the most beautiful shirt and the best shirt ever. And, oh my God. I have to have it and you put it on and it just looks awful. Is there anything wrong with the shirt?
Crista Hopp: (00:29:19): No. Right.
Frances Shefter: (00:29:20): It’s just not working right now. You know, and I love that analogy, which for so much because, you know, he, was using it in dating but, you know, it’s just like that’s the thing. It’s, there’s nothing wrong with you just because your best friend does it that way or you do it this way or you can’t sit through a whole movie and your best friend can or whatever, that’s ok. And so do you do that assessment with the Children also?
Crista Hopp: (00:29:47): Absolutely. Yeah. I think it’s really important for kids to kind of be able to verbalize their own strengths and challenges. And I find that if a student is really able to kind of identify those through questions and usually it’s a great way to even gather more information. then, you know, they’re gonna be more willing to kind of be open to kind of getting support in those areas. And so the more kids are involved in the decision process, the better it is. I’m a big believer in that, I don’t want to just throw things at them. I want them to be part of that decision making process. Coaching is very collaborative. Now, you know, coaching model is actually, you know, more kind of comes from that life coaching model. It’s different with kids and I think that not everybody talks about the reality of that because not all kids are able to kind of always verbalize what they need in that moment. Probably the number one answer I get from kids is, I don’t know. So, you know, you have to dive into that. I don’t know, a little bit but the more that they are actually participating in the process and the more I can do it in a fun way, I really love to play games with students. Even though we see all of our students virtually, but even virtually, we’re very interactive. We’re either playing online games or I send them, you know, kind of a kit that every year they get a kit with, like, has different activities that they can have on hand during a session. , so that we can make it interactive, but definitely wanna make it fun. But definitely they are part of that process. They are part of the team. When we’re working with them. So, yeah.
Frances Shefter: (00:31:27): That makes sense. Like, you know, when you said games, the first thing that popped into my head was yaht, I don’t even know if they play anymore, but it’s, but it’s true, like, because, ok, you got four fives. Are you gonna use it for your fives or are you gonna use it for your four of a kind?
Crista Hopp: (00:31:41): Exactly. Right. Yes. And as a parent that is something you can do for your child is play games, right? Play these board games. My favorite is Connect Four. I used to when I used to see kids in person, they all knew that if there it was a snow day, we were gonna be playing Connect Four digitally because that was, one of my favorite games. But even, you know, different games like Jenga, all of those games have problem solving skills. And so kids are utilizing that but talk about it. That’s the other big part. Important part is, you know, as adults, we tend to have that internal dialogue in our head. Like, oh am I gonna, you know, I try to tap this block block. Oh, wait, that block seems like it’s really stuck. I’m gonna go hit this block. but we’re all that internal dialogue to help our kids build those problem solving skills. We want to teach them how to have that internal dialogue, but we want to do that verbally with them so that we can help build that skill.
Frances Shefter: (00:32:39): That makes so much sense. You know, I never even thought about that. Like my kids and I were playing Connect Four not Connect four Uno last night, you know, which is like crazy eights and, and you know, the little one was like, I don’t have any pink and we’re like, well look, it’s a three. Do you have a three, you know, trying to teach her that and how to do it. And it, it, I mean, to me it came naturally but I didn’t think about when you’re playing Jenga, when you’re playing or, you know, any of the other games of, like, talking through because how else do the kids know what’s going on in the back? Exactly.
Crista Hopp: (00:33:12): That’s also another really good thing to do when you’re reading with your kids because again, we tend to read between the lines, you know, we’re tending to make assumptions about characters or about environments. And if we kind of have that external dialogue, then we’re helping kids build that, which can be a really important skill as they get older and they’re expecting to be like analyzing passages and things like that. So just little things that you can do that are really so simple to put in place. It’s just taking that, you know, extra couple of minutes and
Frances Shefter: (00:33:43): Like thinking about it like, wow, that is simple. Why didn’t I think of that? You know, but, but that’s because that’s your specialty. So when people come in, so when a parent calls you and just say, I don’t know, I heard about this executive functioning stuff. What do I do? What does that process look like for them?
Crista Hopp: (00:34:01): So when people reach out to me, usually what we do is just like a consultation call. I wanna know, you know, what’s going on with the family. What what are the struggles, you know, what’s going well with the student? And then from that point, if we think that they’re appropriate for coaching, what we do is we start with the intake meeting. I, I am a really big believer in that we have to look at a child’s whole life. So I’m not just gonna ask questions about school. I want to know how they’re sleeping, how they’re eating, you know, what activities are they participating in all these different things? So we gather all that information during an intake, we ask for the kids to be part of that in take for a short amount of time. I’m also a big believer in not tormenting teens. They hate sitting in places and hearing people talk about them. So I only make them sit there for a part a a short time and then what we do is we get them started in coaching. We coach either for an entire semester or a year coaching them. Uh Most of our students are, are being uh coached once a week, but we have additional supports because even it was happening before COVID. But even more. So after COVID, we have a lot of kids out there that need some additional support. So we even have services where we’re literally go into the portals every single day, look and see what the kid has to do, what’s missing and communicate with them. Another big thing is I was so lucky as a graduate student to have the most amazing mentor. And so I bring on interns every semester and we do something what’s called body double se sessions. So in the world of ADHD people tend to work better if they’re working alongside someone else. And so every day at six o’clock and seven o’clock, we have body double sessions virtually where students can just log in and do their homework and they’re working with an intern. It’s not again about the content, it’s about the nudges to actually get it done. You know, it’s more about, , you know, but, but some of our kids do need help with planning that, that’s another area with executive function. So, when I look at writing, I look at it from an executive function standpoint, not from like grammar and things like that. I’m looking at, ok, how am I gonna get my thoughts organized and from my head to the paper. And so sometimes even during body double sessions, we’re helping kids with that. And so we offer parents a variety of different services and then we work with the students, we keep in touch with the students again, depending on the level of support they need. , but it can be something like I have one student who I’ve been working with a lot and we both love to bake and she sends me pictures of things she bakes, you know, so it doesn’t always have to be, you know, related to exactly what we’re doing either. You know, we really build rapport with our students and develop relationships.
Frances Shefter: (00:36:47): And so where are you based?
Crista Hopp: (00:36:50): So, I’m based, I’m in Herndon, Virginia. But we actually are all virtual at this point. And the reason for that is because we’re actually seeing students all over the world now. So we have students in China, Greece, Bermuda all over the United States. So really has become more because we’re just seeing people all over. And so uh we do it virtual. I’ll say a lot of families are hesitant towards virtual and obviously COVID, I think made that experience even worse. But coaching is different. It’s a 1 to 1 experience you’re working with that student directly. And we’re also very aware of, you know, what our students need if I have it. Like, like I had a student last week who I met with who’s in fifth grade, she literally was sitting there doing her nails our entire session. That didn’t bother me because she was engaged, she was participating and you know what she was there. So, you know, as coaches, we really make sure that our kids are able to be engaged and you know, whether we have to get creative in that or whether it’s, you know, having them fidget in ways that are appropriate with them we make sure that they are engaged and, uh, I’ve had parents that have said to me, Crista, I never thought it was gonna work and it has. And so I think for a lot of people, it’s become very convenient too because obviously we, you know, families lead to busy schedules, especially when you have more than one child. And so kind of having that convenience of having a kid being able to kind of log on can be really great to kind of have that.
Frances Shefter: (00:38:30): That is so awesome. And so how can people get in touch with you if they’re like, oh, I need to talk to her, at least, you know, at least get a consultation, how to reach out to you.
Crista Hopp: (00:38:39): So, web page is one option, https://www.connectedpathwayscoaching.com, but feel free to reach out to me personally, Crista@connectedpathwayscoaching.com. Either of those ways are perfect. And you know, that can be a great way to reach me and happy to do a free consultation to see if we’re the right place for you and your family.
VOICEOVER: (00:39:11): You’ve been listening to stress-free IEP with your host, Frances Shefter. Remember you do not need to do it all alone. You can reach Frances through ShefterLaw.com where prior episodes are also posted. Thank you for your positive reviews, comments and sharing the show with others through youtube, linkedin Apple Podcast, Spotify, Google Podcast, Stitcher, and more.
The Power and Positivity Behind Executive Functioning Coaching with Crista Hopp (Stress-Free IEP® with Frances Shefter Episode 36)
In this episode of Stress-Free IEP®, Frances Shefter speaks with Crista Hopp, owner of and Executive Function Coach at Connected Pathways Coaching.
Crista is an accomplished professional with a Bachelor’s degree from Rowan University and a Master’s Degree in Counseling Psychology from Bowie University. Her career journey began at the ARC of Cape May County, New Jersey, managing residential homes for teens and adults. Crista later served as the Research Coordinator for the PETIT Study in Northern Virginia, where she conducted neuropsychological assessments and supervised students from local universities.
In 2014, Crista founded Connected Pathways Coaching, LLC, specializing in coaching children with ADHD and teens and college students with ADHD. With a diverse background in counseling, research, and coaching, she brings a unique skill set to help families, especially younger children, unlock their potential.
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Learn more about and connect with Crista Hopp:
Stress-Free IEP®:
Frances Shefter is an Education Attorney and Advocate who is committed to helping her clients have a Stress-Free IEP® experience. In each podcast, Frances interviews inspiring people to share information, educate you, empower you and help you get the knowledge you need.
Watch more episodes of Stress-Free IEP®:
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FULL TRANSCRIPT:
VOICEOVER: (00:00:01): Welcome to Stress-Free IEP®. You do not need to do it all alone with your host, Frances Shefter, Principal of Shefter Law. You can get more details and catch prior episodes at www.Shefterlaw.com. The Stress-Free IEP® video podcast is also posted on YouTube and LinkedIn and you can listen to episodes through Apple podcasts, Spotify, Google podcast, Stitcher and more. Now, here’s the host of Stress-Free IEP®. Frances Shefter.
Frances Shefter: (00:00:37): Hello everyone and welcome to the show and for those of you watching it live, it’s the end of September already. I cannot believe we’re already a month into school and it’s been crazy. And if you’ve been watching a lot of my videos, you know that we’ve kind of been having a theme going on about taking care of you as the parent because it’s very important that we take care of ourselves so that we can be there for our little ones. And so today’s special guest is Crista Hopp with Connected Pathways Coaching and she has a little bit of a different approach. So Crista, please introduce yourself. Tell us a little bit about yourself.
Crista Hopp: (00:01:13): So I’m Crista Hopp, I’m an Executive Function ADHD and Academic coach. I have a coaching practice that I’ve had for almost 10 years now. And I’ve been working with kids with disabilities and without, for probably close to 30 years now. For me it’s really been about how can we help the kids who often are kind of slipping through the school system? Very bright kids often but need a lot of support around them.
Frances Shefter: (00:01:45): Yeah. That’s so true because I know there’s been a lot of times for me that I’ve talked to potential clients or even clients and said, you know, the schools can do a lot with executive functioning, but is it transferring back to the home and the schools can’t necessarily do that? I guess that’s where you come in, right? You can help in the home.
Crista Hopp: (00:02:03): Absolutely. As executive function coaches, we help at the home, but we also help with school support. So it’s kind of a combination of both. I feel like we’re a group of people that has a foot in each door. So when we work with students more often than not, I would say 90% of our referrals are coming to us because their students are struggling in school in some way and so often what we’re doing is going in helping kids come up with different organization methods or planning. It could also be self-regulation. just a whole variety of different things. And so we help support them, whether it is a homework routine or perhaps it’s a routine to get out the door in the morning. So it really does vary. But we help with both school items as well as items at home.
Frances Shefter: (00:02:52): And so it’s continued. So, because that’s one of the things, if they’re doing this in school and they’re doing this in therapy and they’re doing this home the kids can’t wait but that’s school stuff. I don’t have to do that here, you know?
Crista Hopp: (00:03:05): Right. Exactly. Yeah. So it’s nice to have that person who can kind of put the whole picture together and make sure that the kids are getting the support in whichever environment they are in that moment that they need to help in.
Frances Shefter: (00:03:19): That’s awesome. And so do you, I know there’s been a lot of talk that executive functioning has been like a lot of people now, it’s almost everybody coming through our doors. It’s something in executive functioning or just executive functioning. Why is that? Why do you think we’re seeing more of that?
Crista Hopp: (00:03:38): I personally think it gets back to the way our society is structured. We’re a super structured society and I really think it gets back to free play if we look at it. You know, unlike when some of us were little and you would come home from school and you would go out and play and you would get together there with a group of kids and, you know, you guys would decide as a group, what you were gonna do and who was gonna be the leader and what were the rules gonna be? Kids don’t really have, have that as often. We see preschool programs that are extremely structured. We even see kids that are, you know, getting together with other kids, they’re structured play dates, parents are often kind of deciding what is gonna be done during those activities. And so kids are not really being taught some of these crucial problem solving skills at a younger age. And so I see what’s happening is by the time they get to the age where some of these things should become more independent, they just don’t have those skills.
Frances Shefter: (00:04:39): Of course you went somewhere totally different because everybody’s like, oh, it’s because of COVID because they’re home and they didn’t have to do it. Their parents were doing it for them. Well, that, I mean, that’s what everybody’s saying and it’s true to an extent. But I love that you say that, you know, we’re not, you know, it, my husband and I talk about it all the time. We grow up in the era of like you go out and when the street lights came on, you come home. And, and I, when I moved into my neighborhood now I’m in a cul de sac and there were no kids and I’m so excited because we now have a couple of families with kids and they’re, like, constantly out in the cul-de-sac playing or going to each other’s houses and coming up with games, and thinking, having the problem solving. But I know a lot of people don’t have that because, I mean, I feel very lucky with the cul de sac because I feel safe in our neighborhood.
Crista Hopp: (00:05:29): Right. Yeah. So I really think it gets back to that, that free play now. Has it definitely been impacted by some of these things like COVID? Absolutely. There’s no doubt about it. I think kids are probably struggling more now than they definitely did five years ago. We’re definitely seeing it, and ironically, I actually think the group that we’re seeing it with the most, it’s not talked about enough is actually college kids. We’re seeing it a lot more in college than we are necessarily in middle school and high schoolers.
Frances Shefter: (00:06:00): Interesting. Ok. Yeah. I mean, I can see that because I know for me at least also going to college, like, all of a sudden you need to do it all by yourself. And I did have an IEP growing up and I can, I know that something we talk about a lot in IEP meetings and with my family is, is about the transition stuff. Exactly. That’s where the executive functioning comes in and the transition planning because you don’t get to take your IEP to college with you. You know, and you’re not gonna have that.
Crista Hopp: (00:06:32): Right. And it’s not even just that. Right. Like, I’ve had parents the last couple of years that have called me and I said, Crista, I’m worried they’re not gonna remember to eat. I’m worried that, you know, they’re gonna forget to take their medicine or I had one person who knows that I’ve been kind of trying to develop this transitional program where we’ll start with high schoolers and kind of really focus on these life skills and she’s like, you need to add to your list. Crista how to address an envelope. Like, I mean, so it’s really crazy but all of these different things they’re now gonna be responsible for that they have to do.
Frances Shefter: (00:07:06): Yeah. You know, I mean, you don’t think about that, like, it’s just, you know, the kids hit 18 and go out to college and like, boom, they’re expected to do all this stuff and if you’re not taught how to do it, like, how do you do it? You know, some of us are lucky enough that we have parents that have taught us but other kids might not or their parents themselves have executive functioning issues. So if they don’t have the skills, how are they going to teach it to their children?
Crista Hopp: (00:07:29): Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.
Frances Shefter: (00:07:32): I mean, that’s still on the college level. But what age do you think kids should start with executive functioning coaches? The earlier, the better?
Crista Hopp: (00:07:40): I think that ideally when we can get students that are in third or fourth grade, usually what we like to do is start with a little bit of parent coaching, do a couple of months of parent coaching just to get that foundation in. And when I talk about the foundation, what I’m talking about is raising a child who’s neurodivergent is different than raising a neurotypical child. And to be honest with you, I don’t even really necessarily agree. There is a neurotypical person, but that’s a whole nother story, right? But understanding the brain, you know, helping families realize that how the brain is actually structurally different. And so why is it harder to parent a child who might have ADHD or might have just grasp something like this? And what can we put in at home to kind of help support that environment? So, working with the parents for a few months and then when we start to work with the the kids, it it’s fabulous. So the younger we get them and I’ve actually been told by psychologists, they can actually see it. So when they go back to have these reevaluations, they are actually seeing improvements in areas of executive functioning. So they can see that a student has been working with an executive function coach.
Frances Shefter: (00:08:56): Wow. And it’s great working with the parents. You know, and you don’t, you say about raising a neurotypical versus raising neurodiverse, but, like raising any child, every single one is different. You know, my girls are three years apart and, yeah, what works for one does not work for the other. You know, we joke around all the time like that. You know, kids don’t come with handbooks and even if they did the next kid’s gonna come along and it’s gonna be a totally different handbook. So we just throw it out the window.
Crista Hopp: (00:9:24): And I think that’s why kind of being an executive function coach is one of the reasons I love it so much is I often tell the kids like all of our brains are unique and if we can figure out what our brain needs in order to be successful, that’s our goal. I don’t want to be just another adult that’s telling a kid what to do. I want them to understand. Well, this is happening in my brain. So if I practice something everyday, I’m actually building a neuropath way which means that it becomes easier for me to do it. So I think kind of having that understanding that we’re all unique is, is important too.
Frances Shefter: (00:9:59): I love that. It’s my, I’m getting my kids evaluated and that’s one of the things they’re like, well, what are we, why, are we going? And I said, because your brain works differently and we want to figure out how your brain is working so how we can learn the best. And so both of them were like, ok, yay. You know, they’re so excited about going because, you know, it’s true. I remember as a teenager I used to say, you know, people would say I was weird. I’m like, no, I’m unique, you know, and why be normal, you know, what is normal?
Crista Hopp: (00:10:27):. Right. Exactly.
Frances Shefter: (00:10:31): You know, what is normal? So the earlier, the better, you said third or fourth grade was probably best.
Crista Hopp: (00:10:40): I like that age, third or fourth. I think that they’re starting to kind of put some foundational skills into place. And one of the things that we notice as coaches is that, you know, elementary school teachers are really good about having these organizational systems in place. But one of the things that we’re not seeing is that they’re often not explained to kids, they’re just put into place. And so when they’re making that transition from elementary to middle, all of a sudden, they’re expected to be organized, they’re expected to be able to kind of keep everything in place and to manage everything and to write everything down. And the reality is they’ve never been taught these systems. And so kind of, if we have them at that younger age, we can start explaining the why and explaining how and figuring out what’s gonna work for them. And then by the time they get to middle school, we’re just refining those systems and, and making sure that they’re in place.
Frances Shefter: (00:11:32): And that makes sense also because it’s third grade is where the curriculum starts getting harder. I remember an article like way back when, when I was in my teaching days that talked about how if you don’t catch a child by third grade, that the dropout rate is so much higher that it’s, you know, third grade is when it’s the, that’s when things change and things start getting harder. And so teaching them not saying the kids will drop out if you don’t hire an executive coach. But it’s just, it gets harder and the kids are just, you know, and that’s when they’re expected to be more responsible. I mean, my daughter’s in fourth grade and we talk about it all the time, like, you know, the kindergarten holding hands first grade, second grade and even third grade. And now all of a sudden in fourth grade they have all these homework assignments that they’re given assignment on Monday that’s supposed to do every night during the week, due on Friday doing it Thursday night doesn’t always work. But if you’re not taught that and then now all of a sudden homework matters, it’s part of your routine.
Crista Hopp: (00:12:34): Exactly. Yeah, it makes a difference. Yeah. So definitely the younger we can get and then what happens a lot of times I, I think there’s, there’s a couple of different cases. I always say to the parents that coaching is a journey. So it’s not something where with all kids, I see them for a semester and everything clicks and everything is great for some kids. It’s a journey and so coaching might take a longer time, especially if we’re looking at someone who might have more than one area of difficulties, especially when we have things like autism or if we have anxiety or depression, in those cases, we definitely tend to be with our students a little bit longer. And then what happens is for some times we’ll see a student for a period of time, then they’ll take a break and then they might return for transitional period. So for example, I have a student right now who’s in college. I literally see him 15 minutes a week. But when he was in eighth grade or ninth grade, I saw him all the time. He took a break for his last two years of high school and then he came back as a college student. And now we’ve weaned it down to like 15 minutes and I think for him, it’s more just having that second set of eyes so that he can make sure that he is where he needs to be. So that happens with some kids where we’re kind of just being there for those transitional periods and then for other families, especially like you mentioned how some families where the parents do have their own executive function challenges, it’s easier to have that other person that is playing that role of kind of navigating everything. And so for some parents, they hire us with the kids at a younger age and we follow them to college. So we have them for a longer period of time and lots of times that’s just because it’s easier to have someone who’s not the parent being able to navigate some of these things.
Frances Shefter: (00:14:19): Yeah. I wanna make sure we’re clear on this. It’s not only parents that have executive functioning, that need to hire executive functioning coaches for the kids, you know, it’s my, you know, my tagline, you do not need to do it all alone. And that’s kind of been my theme of like, hey, it’s ok to ask for help. I mean, these days parents are expected to do everything. You know, we’re, we’re working full time, we’re cooking dinner, we’re shopping, we’re doing everything and it’s not only the moms, dads are doing it all too. I don’t know about everybody else but I’m tired when I get home from work, I don’t want to have the fight with my kid for homework and making sure it’s organized. And so having somebody like you come in makes life easier for all of us. Right.
Crista Hopp: (00:15:01): Exactly. And I find that sometimes we kind of play this role where we’re kind of wearing this hat as kind of being the organizer. So it’s very common to get a family who’s kind of been given that, that 30 page report from a psychologist, they’re trying to navigate it, you know, they’re, it’s so overwhelming and then they’re recommended to an executive function coach, come to see us and we’re kind of helping them kind of navigate the scene. And so it’s very common for me to be working really closely with advocates, educational lawyers, psychologists, therapists, you know, even doctors because we kind of work together as a team. And, you know, I can tell, you know, if I have a student who’s really struggling in school and the family is really struggling during that IEP process or the 504 process, then I can go ahead and refer them to either an advocate or educational lawyer depending on their needs. But then sometimes it can be, you know, I think maybe a little therapy might help your child. So maybe we should try to find a therapist that can help or it could be a reading tutor. I think that’s another big misunderstanding. Executive function coaches are not content tutors. And so often people will be like, well, I need you to kind of tutor my child and no, we’re not tutors. We’re coaches. Many people don’t realize that the number one predictor of both academic and life success is actually executive functions. And so when we think about that, how imperative these life skills are, that role is really important.
Frances Shefter: (00:16:40): That makes sense. That makes sense. Like I just think of, you know, we used to call them scatter brains right when we were younger and most likely they had executive functioning issues. ADHD or other stuff. But I don’t know, I think we’re around the same age that when we went to school it was like specialized, you know?
Crista Hopp: (00:16:58): Exactly. And that was another, that’s kind of a reason how I got here as a coach was, I was working for a research study out of a big hospital system in the area. And I was working under a neuropsychologist and we were doing testing, neuro psych testing to see the development of kids that were born preterm versus full term. And we were testing the kids at ages 3-6 and nine and we had so many of our controls, meaning our kids that were not born premature, that were coming through and testing really well when it came to, you know, their different academic skills and their IQ. But then families were so concerned because my kid does their homework but then they lose it or they forget to, you know, submit it or, you know, they can’t find, you know, their books to save their lives. You know. And so there was this group of kids that were out there that were not getting a diagnosis of ADHD or autism or learning disabilities, but, had executive function challenges. And I think that’s another unknown is that you do not need to have any diagnosable disability in order to have executive function deficits. Because the reality is, we all have them no matter who we have executive function, strengths and weaknesses.
Frances Shefter: (00:18:19): That makes so much sense that you don’t. And I’m thinking back to cases that I’ve had in families that, you know, we knew something was going on and needed IEP support, but it didn’t fit in one of the little holes. That’s a whole another topic that gets me frustrated of like you have to fit in this mold. I mean, it’s better than what we had before but for our kids with executive functioning and I talk about it all the time that the schools don’t teach regular life skills anymore. You know, I don’t think they have home ec anymore where you learn how to plan a meal and budget and shop and then cook it. You know, that doesn’t come naturally.
Crista Hopp: (00:19:02): Exactly. And it’s funny, I had a team meeting earlier and we were talking about, I have quite a few of our coaches who are in graduate school and we were talking about how, you know, teachers are. Most teachers are not even taught about executive functions in their teaching programs. And so they might have a webinar here or there or workshop, but they’re not being taught how to teach these crucial life skills. But it’s not just about the life skill part about it. All of these executive functions actually trickle down into the academics too. So if we have a student who might be struggling with flexibility, we might see this actually in their reading comprehension, we might see it in their ability to do math. And so by having this group of educators that have not been educated in this area, it’s really impacting our students in the long run.
Frances Shefter: (00:20:00): I love our teachers. I used to be a teacher, I’d never knocked teachers but they’re not trained. And I feel, you know, I don’t want to say I feel sorry for them, but it’s hard, you know, because, I have teachers that have said to me all the time, like, I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to, you know, I don’t know how to do that. Like, what, what am I supposed to do? And I remember when I went to my master’s program and I was learning special education because undergrad was early childhood. And I’m learning all these techniques in special ed. And I had been already been teaching for, like, four years and I’m like, oh, my God, if I had known this then
Crista Hopp: (00:20:38): Right?
Frances Shefter: (00:20:39): Why don’t they teach this to teachers?
Crista Hopp: (00:20:41): Exactly. Basic classroom stuff. Yeah. My mom’s a retired school teacher and, you know, she says to me all the time, she’s like Crista, I never even learned this in my special ed program. She’s like, I’ve learned it from you. She’s like, we were never taught these things, you know, and so that’s been another goal of mine and in the last several years is I want to have these things accessible for both teachers and tutors and coaches. I want them to have that ability to actually understand executive function, understand the different strategies and techniques that they can be incorporating even into the curriculums that they’re utilizing just so they can, you know, help the students that are working, you know, that they’re working with. And so I’ve been, you know, created this executive function course and I’ve been really fortunate to have many teachers that are taking it and their school systems are paying for it, which is and nicer. So they’re able to get that support, but so many of them are kind of giving me feedback and they’re going, I can’t believe I taught for 30 years and I never knew this. Like, you know, it’s, it’s kind of crazy, you know. So, yeah, so it’s been a passion of mine to just really make sure that, you know, as educators, anybody who is working in education, whether you’re a coach, a tutor or a teacher, that we are able to kind of really support all students, not just a group of students.
Frances Shefter: (00:22:02): That’s so great. So your course, I know I wanted to talk about that. So you have an executive functioning course but, but it’s geared towards for teachers or is there a different one for parents or is it the same? What does that look like?
Crista Hopp: (00:22:13): So it’s actually been created for teachers, tutors and coaches. It’s this course that is, you know, the goal is for you to become an executive function specialist. There’s modules that kind of hit on some of the main executive functions. I do a lot of brain science, talk about research and then different strategies and techniques are utilized. And I I use a great video program so that you’re not actually just kind of listening to kind of a power point, you actually can see some of these strategies and techniques actually being acted out with characters because I thought it was really important for people to see it. But I’ve had quite a few parents that have actually taken it too because they said, you know what, I’m not a teacher, a tutor but, uh, you know, I’m a, I’m a parent and I need this. So, so a lot of parents have taken it as well and find it extremely helpful.
Frances Shefter: (00:23:02): That is so great. And it’s, I’m assuming it’s on your website.
Crista Hopp: (00:23:06): It is on the website. Yep, it’s, executive function specialist course. And, , right now it’s about 20 hours. And you literally walk out of it, , with different strategies, techniques, activities. I have everybody actually do some of the activities themselves to experience the executive function. So I’m not just giving you activities to do with your students or your children. You are actually going to experience some of those executive functions. So you really walk away with understanding what it is and then what you can do to help whether it’s in a classroom or at home.
Frances Shefter: (00:23:40): That makes so much sense. It I’m reminded of a class that I took that the teacher made us all crawl under the desks and look up at the teacher. What do you see? And you saw legs and a head and arms, right? What do you think kids draw when they’re preschool? Right. There’s a body, you don’t see a body at that angle and it was just, it was an eye opening for us of like, oh, because you don’t think about that because it’s been so long since we’ve been that young. , they love that so that you make them experience it because if you don’t know, like, it’s hard, like, if you don’t know, you don’t know. You know, but to experience it is how you really learn of what’s happening in the child’s brain to help you.
Crista Hopp: (00:24:28): Exactly. Yeah. So, I tried to make it as comprehensive as possible and the brain science. I’m a really big believer in understanding the brain because if we under like, like my fourth graders know what a narrow pathway is because I just think it’s so important again, I think part of it is just, I don’t want to be that adult who’s telling a kid what to do. I want them to explain. Like, why am I suggesting this, why might this be a good idea? Kids are more likely to be open to suggestions if they understand the why?
Frances Shefter: (00:25:02): That makes sense. You know, I’ve heard so many times I’ve heard kids or parents and it breaks, I mean, I know it breaks my heart as well as clients when the kids. Like, why am I so different? Why can’t I just be normal? , and that’s like the whole other thing of special education. I don’t even like, you know, we all learn differently, you know, we need to have something but it’s, it’s different education. It’s not, you know, it’s special education. And somebody said, , it’s because your kids special but all of our kids are special and so it’s, I love that you teach the kids how to understand their brain. ecause that’s, if you don’t understand the, why, you know, why are you gonna do it?
Crista Hopp: (00:25:41): Right. Right. Why am I gonna do something if I don’t know why I’m doing it? Yeah. Exactly. Yeah. , by the end of the week I’m gonna have a great activity on my website and it’s one of the ones that I do a lot. I do it with all the kids and when I used to do them in person, I used to do it in person and it’s organizing candy, but I always like to start my parent coaching that way too, especially if I have both parents present because the idea behind it is to see, you know, how do you naturally organize and you’re kind of given a pile of candy and you have to organize it. But I love doing the activity because every person tends to kind of slightly do it different. And it’s always nice when parents are like, oh, you, you did it that way, like I did it this way. So to help them realize that just because they might, you know, have organized their notebook in a certain way or they keep track of things in a certain way. That doesn’t mean that’s gonna work for their kids. Their kid actually might need a different system. That’s going to work for their brain.
Frances Shefter: (00:26:41): Which may, I mean, it makes so much sense. It’s just like, and I’m even thinking on the business side of the coaching, you know, my business coach saying like that we hire people and I’m trying to micromanage, I’m like, wait, stop, like I know my brain is great for this stuff. Right. That, for that stuff. And I hired my assistant to do that stuff. Step out. Let’s see how he figures it out. And you know what he did better than I would have done. So that makes sense for parents to because we think, you know, yeah, there are kids. So they’re gonna think the same way as us and their brain is gonna work the same way. But no, they’re half us and half the other parent.
Crista Hopp: (00:27:18): Exactly. What parts. How does it work? And I think that’s another nice thing that I sometimes do with parent coaching is I have both parents do an executive function assessment on themselves. And one of the reasons I do that too is because often what I find is that lots of parents are opposites. Right? Because opposites attract usually. And so kind of even helping families kind of use that information so that if they have a choice, like, say mom is a better organizer than dad. Well, if mom is able to, maybe she is that person who’s gonna help child set up a notebook and kind of understand that. Ok, let’s try to set this up, but let’s work a way that works for you and let’s kind of understand this and maybe if dad is better at regulation, maybe he’s the one that if he’s around in those moments where a child’s really having difficulties regulating themselves, he can be the one that can step in. So even just parents understanding their own executive functions can actually be a great tool for them to utilize as a family when possible.
Frances Shefter: (00:28:22): Yeah. I’m like thinking I need to do that because I know, you know, I’ve said it to my husband before, when we fight and stuff, it’s like we both have to remind ourselves that our brains work differently to begin with. We were also brought up differently. Our life experiences are different and so how we handle something is gonna be different and it’s ok.
Crista Hopp: (00:28:41): Exactly.
Frances Shefter: (00:28:42): Exactly. And that, and it’s important to teach our kids that like, it’s ok, everybody’s brain works different. You’re ok. You’re not strange, you’re not abnormal, you’re not, you know, it’s ok. That activity wasn’t for you. You know, there’s nothing wrong with you. So somebody taught me like years ago about and I love this analogy of when you go shopping for a shirt and you walk into a store and you see the most beautiful shirt and the best shirt ever. And, oh my God. I have to have it and you put it on and it just looks awful. Is there anything wrong with the shirt?
Crista Hopp: (00:29:19): No. Right.
Frances Shefter: (00:29:20): It’s just not working right now. You know, and I love that analogy, which for so much because, you know, he, was using it in dating but, you know, it’s just like that’s the thing. It’s, there’s nothing wrong with you just because your best friend does it that way or you do it this way or you can’t sit through a whole movie and your best friend can or whatever, that’s ok. And so do you do that assessment with the Children also?
Crista Hopp: (00:29:47): Absolutely. Yeah. I think it’s really important for kids to kind of be able to verbalize their own strengths and challenges. And I find that if a student is really able to kind of identify those through questions and usually it’s a great way to even gather more information. then, you know, they’re gonna be more willing to kind of be open to kind of getting support in those areas. And so the more kids are involved in the decision process, the better it is. I’m a big believer in that, I don’t want to just throw things at them. I want them to be part of that decision making process. Coaching is very collaborative. Now, you know, coaching model is actually, you know, more kind of comes from that life coaching model. It’s different with kids and I think that not everybody talks about the reality of that because not all kids are able to kind of always verbalize what they need in that moment. Probably the number one answer I get from kids is, I don’t know. So, you know, you have to dive into that. I don’t know, a little bit but the more that they are actually participating in the process and the more I can do it in a fun way, I really love to play games with students. Even though we see all of our students virtually, but even virtually, we’re very interactive. We’re either playing online games or I send them, you know, kind of a kit that every year they get a kit with, like, has different activities that they can have on hand during a session. , so that we can make it interactive, but definitely wanna make it fun. But definitely they are part of that process. They are part of the team. When we’re working with them. So, yeah.
Frances Shefter: (00:31:27): That makes sense. Like, you know, when you said games, the first thing that popped into my head was yaht, I don’t even know if they play anymore, but it’s, but it’s true, like, because, ok, you got four fives. Are you gonna use it for your fives or are you gonna use it for your four of a kind?
Crista Hopp: (00:31:41): Exactly. Right. Yes. And as a parent that is something you can do for your child is play games, right? Play these board games. My favorite is Connect Four. I used to when I used to see kids in person, they all knew that if there it was a snow day, we were gonna be playing Connect Four digitally because that was, one of my favorite games. But even, you know, different games like Jenga, all of those games have problem solving skills. And so kids are utilizing that but talk about it. That’s the other big part. Important part is, you know, as adults, we tend to have that internal dialogue in our head. Like, oh am I gonna, you know, I try to tap this block block. Oh, wait, that block seems like it’s really stuck. I’m gonna go hit this block. but we’re all that internal dialogue to help our kids build those problem solving skills. We want to teach them how to have that internal dialogue, but we want to do that verbally with them so that we can help build that skill.
Frances Shefter: (00:32:39): That makes so much sense. You know, I never even thought about that. Like my kids and I were playing Connect Four not Connect four Uno last night, you know, which is like crazy eights and, and you know, the little one was like, I don’t have any pink and we’re like, well look, it’s a three. Do you have a three, you know, trying to teach her that and how to do it. And it, it, I mean, to me it came naturally but I didn’t think about when you’re playing Jenga, when you’re playing or, you know, any of the other games of, like, talking through because how else do the kids know what’s going on in the back? Exactly.
Crista Hopp: (00:33:12): That’s also another really good thing to do when you’re reading with your kids because again, we tend to read between the lines, you know, we’re tending to make assumptions about characters or about environments. And if we kind of have that external dialogue, then we’re helping kids build that, which can be a really important skill as they get older and they’re expecting to be like analyzing passages and things like that. So just little things that you can do that are really so simple to put in place. It’s just taking that, you know, extra couple of minutes and
Frances Shefter: (00:33:43): Like thinking about it like, wow, that is simple. Why didn’t I think of that? You know, but, but that’s because that’s your specialty. So when people come in, so when a parent calls you and just say, I don’t know, I heard about this executive functioning stuff. What do I do? What does that process look like for them?
Crista Hopp: (00:34:01): So when people reach out to me, usually what we do is just like a consultation call. I wanna know, you know, what’s going on with the family. What what are the struggles, you know, what’s going well with the student? And then from that point, if we think that they’re appropriate for coaching, what we do is we start with the intake meeting. I, I am a really big believer in that we have to look at a child’s whole life. So I’m not just gonna ask questions about school. I want to know how they’re sleeping, how they’re eating, you know, what activities are they participating in all these different things? So we gather all that information during an intake, we ask for the kids to be part of that in take for a short amount of time. I’m also a big believer in not tormenting teens. They hate sitting in places and hearing people talk about them. So I only make them sit there for a part a a short time and then what we do is we get them started in coaching. We coach either for an entire semester or a year coaching them. Uh Most of our students are, are being uh coached once a week, but we have additional supports because even it was happening before COVID. But even more. So after COVID, we have a lot of kids out there that need some additional support. So we even have services where we’re literally go into the portals every single day, look and see what the kid has to do, what’s missing and communicate with them. Another big thing is I was so lucky as a graduate student to have the most amazing mentor. And so I bring on interns every semester and we do something what’s called body double se sessions. So in the world of ADHD people tend to work better if they’re working alongside someone else. And so every day at six o’clock and seven o’clock, we have body double sessions virtually where students can just log in and do their homework and they’re working with an intern. It’s not again about the content, it’s about the nudges to actually get it done. You know, it’s more about, , you know, but, but some of our kids do need help with planning that, that’s another area with executive function. So, when I look at writing, I look at it from an executive function standpoint, not from like grammar and things like that. I’m looking at, ok, how am I gonna get my thoughts organized and from my head to the paper. And so sometimes even during body double sessions, we’re helping kids with that. And so we offer parents a variety of different services and then we work with the students, we keep in touch with the students again, depending on the level of support they need. , but it can be something like I have one student who I’ve been working with a lot and we both love to bake and she sends me pictures of things she bakes, you know, so it doesn’t always have to be, you know, related to exactly what we’re doing either. You know, we really build rapport with our students and develop relationships.
Frances Shefter: (00:36:47): And so where are you based?
Crista Hopp: (00:36:50): So, I’m based, I’m in Herndon, Virginia. But we actually are all virtual at this point. And the reason for that is because we’re actually seeing students all over the world now. So we have students in China, Greece, Bermuda all over the United States. So really has become more because we’re just seeing people all over. And so uh we do it virtual. I’ll say a lot of families are hesitant towards virtual and obviously COVID, I think made that experience even worse. But coaching is different. It’s a 1 to 1 experience you’re working with that student directly. And we’re also very aware of, you know, what our students need if I have it. Like, like I had a student last week who I met with who’s in fifth grade, she literally was sitting there doing her nails our entire session. That didn’t bother me because she was engaged, she was participating and you know what she was there. So, you know, as coaches, we really make sure that our kids are able to be engaged and you know, whether we have to get creative in that or whether it’s, you know, having them fidget in ways that are appropriate with them we make sure that they are engaged and, uh, I’ve had parents that have said to me, Crista, I never thought it was gonna work and it has. And so I think for a lot of people, it’s become very convenient too because obviously we, you know, families lead to busy schedules, especially when you have more than one child. And so kind of having that convenience of having a kid being able to kind of log on can be really great to kind of have that.
Frances Shefter: (00:38:30): That is so awesome. And so how can people get in touch with you if they’re like, oh, I need to talk to her, at least, you know, at least get a consultation, how to reach out to you.
Crista Hopp: (00:38:39): So, web page is one option, https://www.connectedpathwayscoaching.com, but feel free to reach out to me personally, Crista@connectedpathwayscoaching.com. Either of those ways are perfect. And you know, that can be a great way to reach me and happy to do a free consultation to see if we’re the right place for you and your family.
Frances Shefter: (00:39:.0)Absolutely. Yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely.
VOICEOVER: (00:39:11): You’ve been listening to stress-free IEP with your host, Frances Shefter. Remember you do not need to do it all alone. You can reach Frances through ShefterLaw.com where prior episodes are also posted. Thank you for your positive reviews, comments and sharing the show with others through youtube, linkedin Apple Podcast, Spotify, Google Podcast, Stitcher, and more.
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