In a recent episode of Stress-Free IEP®, host Frances Shefter interviewed Jen Dryer, a parenting coach specializing in helping parents of neurodivergent children. Jen shared her personal journey and professional insights, providing valuable strategies for managing the challenges faced by parents of children with unique needs.
Jen Dryer’s Background and Personal Journey
Jen Dryer, a former New York City public school teacher and literacy coach, transitioned into parenting coaching about six years ago. Her motivation stemmed from her experience with her own neurodivergent son, who was diagnosed with significant delays in speech and social-emotional development at a young age. Jen’s journey began with seeking early intervention services in Washington, D.C., which led to remarkable progress for her son. This experience inspired her to help other parents navigate similar challenges.
Creating Support Programs for Parents
Jen’s passion for coaching led her to collaborate with Gabrielle Nicolet from Speech Kids Therapy Center. Together, they developed the Raising Orchid Kids program, which combines practical strategies for understanding and managing children’s behavior with a strong emphasis on creating a supportive community for parents. The program started just before the pandemic in March 2020 and quickly transitioned to a virtual format, allowing them to reach families globally.
Practical Strategies for Parenting Neurodivergent Kids
The Raising Orchid Kids program is an eight-week course that provides parents with practical strategies to manage the unique challenges of raising neurodivergent children. The course focuses on understanding children’s behavior, reducing chaos and stress, and shifting parents’ perspectives on their children’s neurological and behavioral needs. Jen and Gabrielle advocate for neurodiversity-affirming support, emphasizing the importance of accepting and supporting children as they are.
Understanding and Validating Children’s Behavior
A key aspect of Jen’s coaching is helping parents understand that behavior is a form of communication. She encourages parents to see beyond the surface behavior and identify the underlying causes. This approach, often visualized as an iceberg, highlights that much of what influences behavior is hidden beneath the surface. By addressing these underlying issues, parents can better support their children and mitigate challenging behaviors.
The Power of Listening and Flexibility
Jen shared anecdotes illustrating the importance of listening to children and being flexible in response to their needs. She emphasized that many perceived defiant behaviors are actually expressions of a child’s inability to cope with a situation. By understanding and validating their children’s feelings, parents can create a more supportive environment. Simple adjustments, like offering choices or explaining the reasons behind rules, can significantly improve a child’s response and cooperation.
Overcoming Common Misunderstandings
One common misunderstanding that Jen addresses is the perception of defiance in children’s behavior. She explains that most challenging behaviors are not deliberate acts of defiance but rather signals of unmet needs or difficulties in coping. By shifting their perspective, parents can adopt a more empathetic and effective approach to managing their children’s behavior.
Implementing Effective Interventions
Jen and Gabrielle’s program emphasizes the importance of antecedent interventions—strategies implemented before a challenging situation arises to set children up for success. This proactive approach helps prevent meltdowns and other stress behaviors by addressing potential triggers and providing children with the tools they need to cope.
Importance of Co-Regulation
Co-regulation, where parents help their children regulate their emotions through their own calm and supportive presence, is another crucial strategy discussed by Jen. She shared examples of how providing comfort and understanding can help children feel safe and manage their emotions more effectively. Co-regulation not only supports the child but also models healthy emotional regulation for them.
Addressing Anxiety and Behavioral Challenges
Jen highlighted the impact of anxiety on children’s behavior, explaining that anxiety often manifests as a need to control their environment. By identifying and addressing the sources of anxiety, parents can help their children feel more secure and reduce reactive behaviors. Techniques like validating feelings and providing predictable routines can be particularly effective.
Educating and Supporting Parents
In addition to their core course, Jen and Gabrielle offer various resources to support parents, including support groups for parents of neurodivergent teens, webinars on topics like executive functioning and sibling support, and one-on-one coaching sessions. They also provide ongoing support through a membership program that includes Q&A sessions, articles, and access to webinars.
Conclusion
Jen Dryer’s insights and strategies offer valuable guidance for parents navigating the complexities of raising neurodivergent children. Her emphasis on understanding behavior, providing flexible and empathetic support, and implementing proactive interventions underscores the importance of a holistic approach to parenting. Through programs like Raising Orchid Kids, Jen and Gabrielle are helping parents create supportive, affirming environments where their children can thrive.
For more information and resources, visit Raising Orchid Kids.
Frances Shefter is an Education Attorney and Advocate who is committed to helping her clients have a Stress-Free IEP® experience. In each podcast, Frances interviews inspiring people to share information, educate you, empower you and help you get the knowledge you need.
Navigating Parenting for Neurodivergent Children: Insights from Jen Dryer
Stress-Free IEP® with Frances Shefter, Episode 64
Episode Summary:
In a recent episode of Stress-Free IEP®, host Frances Shefter interviewed Jen Dryer, a parenting coach specializing in helping parents of neurodivergent children. Jen shared her personal journey and professional insights, providing valuable strategies for managing the challenges faced by parents of children with unique needs.
Jen Dryer’s Background and Personal Journey
Jen Dryer, a former New York City public school teacher and literacy coach, transitioned into parenting coaching about six years ago. Her motivation stemmed from her experience with her own neurodivergent son, who was diagnosed with significant delays in speech and social-emotional development at a young age. Jen’s journey began with seeking early intervention services in Washington, D.C., which led to remarkable progress for her son. This experience inspired her to help other parents navigate similar challenges.
Creating Support Programs for Parents
Jen’s passion for coaching led her to collaborate with Gabrielle Nicolet from Speech Kids Therapy Center. Together, they developed the Raising Orchid Kids program, which combines practical strategies for understanding and managing children’s behavior with a strong emphasis on creating a supportive community for parents. The program started just before the pandemic in March 2020 and quickly transitioned to a virtual format, allowing them to reach families globally.
Practical Strategies for Parenting Neurodivergent Kids
The Raising Orchid Kids program is an eight-week course that provides parents with practical strategies to manage the unique challenges of raising neurodivergent children. The course focuses on understanding children’s behavior, reducing chaos and stress, and shifting parents’ perspectives on their children’s neurological and behavioral needs. Jen and Gabrielle advocate for neurodiversity-affirming support, emphasizing the importance of accepting and supporting children as they are.
Understanding and Validating Children’s Behavior
A key aspect of Jen’s coaching is helping parents understand that behavior is a form of communication. She encourages parents to see beyond the surface behavior and identify the underlying causes. This approach, often visualized as an iceberg, highlights that much of what influences behavior is hidden beneath the surface. By addressing these underlying issues, parents can better support their children and mitigate challenging behaviors.
The Power of Listening and Flexibility
Jen shared anecdotes illustrating the importance of listening to children and being flexible in response to their needs. She emphasized that many perceived defiant behaviors are actually expressions of a child’s inability to cope with a situation. By understanding and validating their children’s feelings, parents can create a more supportive environment. Simple adjustments, like offering choices or explaining the reasons behind rules, can significantly improve a child’s response and cooperation.
Overcoming Common Misunderstandings
One common misunderstanding that Jen addresses is the perception of defiance in children’s behavior. She explains that most challenging behaviors are not deliberate acts of defiance but rather signals of unmet needs or difficulties in coping. By shifting their perspective, parents can adopt a more empathetic and effective approach to managing their children’s behavior.
Implementing Effective Interventions
Jen and Gabrielle’s program emphasizes the importance of antecedent interventions—strategies implemented before a challenging situation arises to set children up for success. This proactive approach helps prevent meltdowns and other stress behaviors by addressing potential triggers and providing children with the tools they need to cope.
Importance of Co-Regulation
Co-regulation, where parents help their children regulate their emotions through their own calm and supportive presence, is another crucial strategy discussed by Jen. She shared examples of how providing comfort and understanding can help children feel safe and manage their emotions more effectively. Co-regulation not only supports the child but also models healthy emotional regulation for them.
Addressing Anxiety and Behavioral Challenges
Jen highlighted the impact of anxiety on children’s behavior, explaining that anxiety often manifests as a need to control their environment. By identifying and addressing the sources of anxiety, parents can help their children feel more secure and reduce reactive behaviors. Techniques like validating feelings and providing predictable routines can be particularly effective.
Educating and Supporting Parents
In addition to their core course, Jen and Gabrielle offer various resources to support parents, including support groups for parents of neurodivergent teens, webinars on topics like executive functioning and sibling support, and one-on-one coaching sessions. They also provide ongoing support through a membership program that includes Q&A sessions, articles, and access to webinars.
Conclusion
Jen Dryer’s insights and strategies offer valuable guidance for parents navigating the complexities of raising neurodivergent children. Her emphasis on understanding behavior, providing flexible and empathetic support, and implementing proactive interventions underscores the importance of a holistic approach to parenting. Through programs like Raising Orchid Kids, Jen and Gabrielle are helping parents create supportive, affirming environments where their children can thrive.
For more information and resources, visit Raising Orchid Kids.
Learn more about Jen Dryer:
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Stress-Free IEP®:
Frances Shefter is an Education Attorney and Advocate who is committed to helping her clients have a Stress-Free IEP® experience. In each podcast, Frances interviews inspiring people to share information, educate you, empower you and help you get the knowledge you need.
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